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Every year when Valentine’s Day rolls around, the media are brimming with delightful ideas about where to have a romantic vacation.

This year, Bing Travel is taking the contrarian viewpoint. In a new slide show, we offer up 14 incredible opportunities for a decidedly unromantic vacation. Some trips are universally awful for couples. Some are particularly unromantic for him; others are especially appalling for her. One thing is certain: They’re all guaranteed to make Cupid hide behind a shrub.

For example, what could be less romantic than snuggling on an iron bed in Karosta Prison in Liepaja, Latvia? Very little, we think, unless you are vacationing in Saudi Arabia, where men and women are not permitted to hold hands or embrace in public. A cruise to Antarctica is a fairly abysmal choice for Valentine’s Day, unless you are photographers in love, warm in the glow of shooting two-story waves and sharing a little bottle of motion-sickness pills.

Planning to take your hunky guy to the Hello Kitty Theme Park? Please proceed with caution. Your romance could die a slow, pink death. Thinking of slinking off to Sweden with your gorgeous gal pal for a night in the Ice Hotel? Be forewarned. Many women will tell you that the word “romantic” doesn’t marry well with the words “north of the Arctic Circle,” “darkest time of the year,” “long johns” and “blocks of ice.”

Have you endured an unromantic vacation? Tell other travelers about your ghastly experiences in the comments section.